3 Things To Remember On Mothers Day
Allow yourself to feel whatever it is that you feel about this day not what others tell you you should feel. If you're hurt, angry, sad, lonely, feeling a deep loss.. whatever it is, feel it and be where you are.
Not everyone can understand the relationship or the dynamic you had with your mother. Often times people will try to project their own views and beliefs such as "you only have one mother" or "c'mon whatever happened between you two was in the past" which isn't helpful no matter how well meaning they may be. If you’re someone that says this to others, please know that this is not helpful, it's hurtful.
People often have complicated relationships, have experienced trauma, abuse, abandonment and many other experiences so respect how others feel and how you may feel about Mother’s Day. You may be dealing with some painful and hard emotions around the loss of a child or maybe this is your first Mother’s Day without your own mom. Give yourself permission and space to do what you need to do to take care of yourself.
2. There are many different versions of a mother, There are many mothers out there that did not birth their child. Be respectful of others choice in how they choose to mother or not mother at all. Do not make assumptions if you're not positive on someone's motherhood status.
3. As with any holiday, don't feel guilted into doing something you don't want to do. Set boundaries for yourself, use your voice and keep that throat Chakra open. A big one I hear with my clients is that they feel guilty about not wanting to uphold these family "traditions". Traditions can get outdated and it IS ok to make new ones or revised ones with the times. Just look at how many traditions we've been changing in society just in the past decade alone. I'd even invite you to dig deeper into the meaning of the tradition instead of hanging onto the tradition itself and make it something more meaningful for you vs. something you feel guilted into.
I would love to know what Mother's Day means for you and what you're doing to hold space for yourself on this day. Share in the comments below.